Now, one would think that if I was doing a “the one that started it” post, I would have done that one first.
You would be wrong.
Part of the reason for that is that there was a lag between when I first saw this and when I was actually able to purchase it. When the Dollar Tree in our town first opened, it was this product that made me think. “Huh. I wonder if this stuff really works. If it works that well, I would think I would have seen it before. And it would probably be more than a dollar.” That’s the thought that got the wheels spinning to create what is now my most popular feature on my blog. Y’all are a weird bunch, I gotta say. But thanks for enjoying my little experiments. It’s surprising how the knowledge that you guys love Dollar Daze makes me super excited whenever I see a Dollar Tree. While most people see cheap shit, I see blog fodder.
Like this weekend. Andrea and one of her best friends decided they wanted to go back to school shopping at Mall of America. I personally find that place a little scary, but I’ll go from time to time because (in fairness) they do have some things you can’t find anywhere else. But going on a weekend? *shudder* The girls are now at the age where they can wander on their own, which left the chauffeur with some time to explore. And when I found this on the third floor, I practically squeed!
I will admit I was a little disappointed. It wasn’t as big as some of the other ones I frequent, and their selection wasn’t as vast. But just the fact that they had a Dollar Tree at the mall was shocking to me.
But I digress.
Back to the inspiration for this whole feature. What product could inspire such greatness? What made me decide I needed to experiment and see which products actually worked and were worth the dollar (or, conversely, were way better than a dollar)? Poop drops.
According to this, you can put a couple of drops in your toilet bowl before you drop the kids off at the pool, and no one will be the wiser. I found that exceedingly difficult to believe, but when I had decided to actually start the blog posts, they didn’t have the product anymore. Thankfully, they brought it back this summer and now I get to share my muse with the world.
What does it say about me that poop is my muse? Don’t answer that.
So how does this work?
Seems simple enough. Because the curiosity was killing me, I decided to smell it. I was wondering what “plant extract” they were using.
Apparently eucalyptus, because it smells like Vicks Vap-O-Rub. Which then made me a little nervous to use because what if there was splashing? We know that I’ve already had a run-on with Vicks and my tender bits. I was not looking forward to a repeat performance.
I will be super nice and not gross you all out with actual pictures of the before, during and after stages of this experiment. Although I could, because apparently it’s a thing. But I won’t, because I think that’s gross. I will just say that this product worked about as well as I thought it would. Which is not at all. Or at least not in the way they intended. Because now, instead of my bathroom smelling like someone dropped a deuce, it smells like someone dropped a deuce and has bronchitis. You know that smell the house gets when you’ve had two or three people down with the flu at the same time and you’ve been running the vaporizer for a week and a half straight? Yeah, smells like that. Not exactly refreshing.
So sorry, Dollar Tree. Your luck has run out. We were on a good streak, with just a little stumble with last week’s origami. This week’s product is just an epic fail. F. Maybe even F-, because making my house smell like sick instead of shit isn’t exactly the upgrade I was looking for.
But look on the bright side! If it hadn’t been for these drops in the first place, I would never have started the Dollar Daze feature, so in that way it’s an EPIC WIN! You can have it both ways! Yay poop drops!